To everyone asking you for anything, give it and do not ask for it back; for, to all, the Father wishes to give these things from his own free gifts….But also, concerning this rule, it has been said: “Let your alms sweat in your hands, until you know to whom you might give it.” (Didache 1:5a, 6)
The community which lived by the teachings of the Didache was made up of mostly poor people. They lived in the first century and were trying to live by the example of Jesus. There wasn’t any social safety net in their day – no welfare, no Medicaid or medicare, no food stamps. And their lives were very hard. Often people living on the edge saw their children sold into slavery to pay debts they couldn’t avoid. Like Tennessee Ernie Ford used to sing, they “owed their soul to the company store.”
One thing that attracted these people to the followers of Jesus was the way they cared for one another. This wasn’t just shown by the fact that they liked one another and got along well. When someone was hungry, they ate at the common table. When they were homeless, someone gave them a place to sleep under a roof at night. When they were widowed or orphaned, the community kept them from being sold into slavery by providing them a home. These were often poor folk, but they shared what little they had with one another.
So before people joined this community, they needed to demonstrate that they could understand and demonstrate generosity. They had to have the kind of spirit that would divide the last cookie into two pieces and give away the bigger part. Jesus had said, “when someone asks for your cloak, give them your shirt as well.” He wasn’t talking in symbols there. He meant take the one extra shirt you own and give it to someone who has nothing to wear.
There’s a comfort in living in a community of folks like that. It means they’ve got your back and you won’t starve or go naked. There’s also a danger in that kind of community, as you may really be asked to give away all you’ve got. Years ago I had a friend who served a church in a very poor neighborhood. People always needed something, and he’d help as much as he could. I heard his wife say one day that she never knew if there’d be towels in the closet when the kids took a bath because he may have given them away. That’s real generosity. It’s also foolhardy. Your own kids need towels and going without isn’t a good idea.
The Didache says, “Let your alms sweat in your hands until you know too whom you might give.” There’s the balance to asking for utter generosity – make wise decisions about what you give and to whom. Most of us have the ability to give to others, and we are blessed by doing that. Most of us don’t have the ability to give everything we’re asked for. So we have to make choices. My mom has a stack of junk mail by her coffee table. Those are the folks she’s going to give a donation to when she wins the lottery. But she’s not going to give to them until then because she can’t do that and pay her own bills. She has a few folks she supports now, and it makes her happy to give those gifts. And when she can, she’ll give more.
All of us make those decisions every day. The Didache encourages us to make them carefully. Do you remember carrying a nickel to Sunday School to put in the offering? It made your palm sweaty. Hang on to your gift now like you did then. And when you do give it, it will make you just as happy as it did then.
When we make careful decisions about what to give and to whom, we find we can be more generous than we thought we could. When you give away 5% of your income, it becomes easier to give 10%. When you give an extra gift to the Salvation Army at Christmas, you find you can make an extra gift to someone else in January. When you see a real need, your practice in giving makes it possible for you to meet those needs that come up along the way. Making careful decisions makes more gifts possible than you imagined. And when each of us does what we can, and finds we can do a little bit more, then the needs around us are met.
Having the community of Jesus followers take care of one another and the folks in their neighborhoods is God’s plan for caring for the world. In the 21st century, we learn that our neighborhood is the world. And God’s provided what we need to care for one and all. It just takes all of us working together, carefully, and joyfully.
Saturday, March 3, 2012
Monday, February 27, 2012
Ancient Advice Still Helpful
You will not hate any person,
But some you will reprove,
And concerning others you will pray,
And some you will love more than your soul.
- Didache 2:7
The Didache, whose title literally means “teaching” or “training” was used to mentor people who wanted to enter the Christian community in the first century. We’d call it a manual, except that it wasn’t written down. Rather, people memorized it and then could call it to mind as they needed it to help them make decisions about the way they lived.
It was a little like the Boy Scout Oath which scouts memorize so that it can guide their behavior as honorable Scouts:
On my honor, I will do my best To do my duty to God and my country and to obey the Scout Law; To help other people at all times; To keep myself physically strong, mentally awake and morally straight.
Just like Scouts are learning how to behave in ways which honor their organization, followers of Jesus were learning how to live like Jesus lived, and the Didache expected them to practice its guidelines until they had the lifestyle down. Then they became members of the community by being baptized.
We have a mental picture of the early Christians living in peace and harmony, agreeing about everything, and easily following the teachings of Jesus. The centuries since these folks founded the Jesus movement make it easier for us to see them in this idyllic way. In reality, the first followers of Jesus were human beings just like us, and they struggled to get along together and to know what Jesus expected of them. They needed the help of the Didache and their teachers just as much as communities do today.
So the Didache gives practical advice for how to form a group of people with common goals – to live like Jesus lived – and common hopes – to see the reign of God on earth. Their purpose was to support each other in community so that they could reflect the dream of Jesus for the way people lived – fully connected to God and practicing justice and love toward each other.
The trouble is, even people with the best intentions still have to get along with one another. And there are always personality differences and differences in their priorities which rub up against each other. So the Didache talks about how to treat one another. It talks about this a lot because forming strong human relationships is the most important step in forming a relationship with God. The Bible is pretty clear that we can’t love God without loving one another, and the way we treat one another is the most telling evidence about how our love for God is working in our lives.
One of the things I love about the Didache is that it’s so practical and flexible. It says, “Here’s the rule…” and then it says, “but if you can’t keep it ideally, then try to come close like this…” Today’s verse is a great example of this. It says, “You won’t hate anyone.” That’s a pretty clear rule and an important ideal. Then it says, “but some you will reprove and concerning others you will pray and some you will love more than your soul.” Don’t hate anybody, but boy it’s going to be hard to manage that with some folks who are just begging to be hated. And with other folks you’re going to show a real preference because they are your soulmates.
Let’s look at this good advice a little more closely. First, don’t hate anyone. Hatred drives people apart and brings dissension into a community. Do you remember as a child telling your mom or dad “I just hate him. I just hate her.” An usually those childhood friends deserved that hatred. They were mean and hurtful and hit and pinched and lied about us. They made us feel plain terrible, and it seemed like there wasn’t any way to deal with it but to give in to the pain we were feeling and name it “hate.” The trouble is, hate never hurt that other person. It just made us feel even worse. It kept us awake at night while they slept peacefully in their beds. It made us dread going out to recess because we didn’t want to see or speak to them. Hate ties us up in knots and makes us miserable. Hate keeps us from talking to one another and certainly gets in the way of coming to reconciliation – to that point when we can say, “I’m sorry,” and make things right again. The advice not to hate others is really for our own good. Hate is a poison and when we fill our minds and hearts with it, then we’re the ones who pay the price.
But not everyone is easy to love and certainly not easy to get along with! So some folks in a community need to be reproved from time to time. Communities have core values and standards of behavior and we expect people to live by them. These standards may vary from place to place and time to time. It’s OK to belch your pop or beer when the guys are watching football but not do to the same at Grandma’s Sunday dinner table. It’s never OK to lie about someone else, or to repeat mean stories to hurt someone. And when that behavior happens, healthy communities gently bring it up and ask the person to make a change. My best friends are the ones who can tell me when I’m out of line because they trust me to improve. That kind of community helps us grow into maturity as people and as followers of Jesus.
And some people you will pray about… Isn’t it the truth that some folks are just incorrigible! They don’t respond well to correction, even when we’re being our most gentle. They always disagree with us, just for the fun of it. We would never pick them first to play on our team. But we aren’t served by hating them or getting worked up over them. So we pray about them. We turn them over to God, who’s better in the love department than we are, and let it go. Don’t pray and hang on! Pray and let go and move on. It’s been that way in human relationships since the beginning of time.
And some folks will be our best soulmates. Jesus had one disciple who was “beloved.” Tradition says that’s John, although the scripture isn’t clear about that. Of course when he’d gathered a bunch of men and women to travel with him and learn his ways, he had some he liked better than others. We all have close friends. That doesn’t keep us from treating others with respect. But what a good gift of God to give us folks who get us. The ones who laugh with us when no one else understands the joke. The ones who cry with us. The ones who make our days joyful. We say we’re lucky to have friends like that. But it’s not luck – it’s God’s plan for making human life wonderful, and for helping us be the great humans we’re meant to be.
Every community has this rich mix of people. Isn’t it great that when I’m the one that person is praying to tolerate, there’s also someone who thinks I’m the best. That’s why we gather together, so in the mix, we can each find the support and encouragement we need. And enough folks to keep us honest and humble, too. From the very beginning the followers of Jesus have gathered in community, and the guidelines help those communities to be healthy. No hate. Plenty of differences so that we have all we need – all the skills and viewpoints and personalities that make us complete. And a big dose of honesty and respect that helps us get along.
But some you will reprove,
And concerning others you will pray,
And some you will love more than your soul.
- Didache 2:7
The Didache, whose title literally means “teaching” or “training” was used to mentor people who wanted to enter the Christian community in the first century. We’d call it a manual, except that it wasn’t written down. Rather, people memorized it and then could call it to mind as they needed it to help them make decisions about the way they lived.
It was a little like the Boy Scout Oath which scouts memorize so that it can guide their behavior as honorable Scouts:
On my honor, I will do my best To do my duty to God and my country and to obey the Scout Law; To help other people at all times; To keep myself physically strong, mentally awake and morally straight.
Just like Scouts are learning how to behave in ways which honor their organization, followers of Jesus were learning how to live like Jesus lived, and the Didache expected them to practice its guidelines until they had the lifestyle down. Then they became members of the community by being baptized.
We have a mental picture of the early Christians living in peace and harmony, agreeing about everything, and easily following the teachings of Jesus. The centuries since these folks founded the Jesus movement make it easier for us to see them in this idyllic way. In reality, the first followers of Jesus were human beings just like us, and they struggled to get along together and to know what Jesus expected of them. They needed the help of the Didache and their teachers just as much as communities do today.
So the Didache gives practical advice for how to form a group of people with common goals – to live like Jesus lived – and common hopes – to see the reign of God on earth. Their purpose was to support each other in community so that they could reflect the dream of Jesus for the way people lived – fully connected to God and practicing justice and love toward each other.
The trouble is, even people with the best intentions still have to get along with one another. And there are always personality differences and differences in their priorities which rub up against each other. So the Didache talks about how to treat one another. It talks about this a lot because forming strong human relationships is the most important step in forming a relationship with God. The Bible is pretty clear that we can’t love God without loving one another, and the way we treat one another is the most telling evidence about how our love for God is working in our lives.
One of the things I love about the Didache is that it’s so practical and flexible. It says, “Here’s the rule…” and then it says, “but if you can’t keep it ideally, then try to come close like this…” Today’s verse is a great example of this. It says, “You won’t hate anyone.” That’s a pretty clear rule and an important ideal. Then it says, “but some you will reprove and concerning others you will pray and some you will love more than your soul.” Don’t hate anybody, but boy it’s going to be hard to manage that with some folks who are just begging to be hated. And with other folks you’re going to show a real preference because they are your soulmates.
Let’s look at this good advice a little more closely. First, don’t hate anyone. Hatred drives people apart and brings dissension into a community. Do you remember as a child telling your mom or dad “I just hate him. I just hate her.” An usually those childhood friends deserved that hatred. They were mean and hurtful and hit and pinched and lied about us. They made us feel plain terrible, and it seemed like there wasn’t any way to deal with it but to give in to the pain we were feeling and name it “hate.” The trouble is, hate never hurt that other person. It just made us feel even worse. It kept us awake at night while they slept peacefully in their beds. It made us dread going out to recess because we didn’t want to see or speak to them. Hate ties us up in knots and makes us miserable. Hate keeps us from talking to one another and certainly gets in the way of coming to reconciliation – to that point when we can say, “I’m sorry,” and make things right again. The advice not to hate others is really for our own good. Hate is a poison and when we fill our minds and hearts with it, then we’re the ones who pay the price.
But not everyone is easy to love and certainly not easy to get along with! So some folks in a community need to be reproved from time to time. Communities have core values and standards of behavior and we expect people to live by them. These standards may vary from place to place and time to time. It’s OK to belch your pop or beer when the guys are watching football but not do to the same at Grandma’s Sunday dinner table. It’s never OK to lie about someone else, or to repeat mean stories to hurt someone. And when that behavior happens, healthy communities gently bring it up and ask the person to make a change. My best friends are the ones who can tell me when I’m out of line because they trust me to improve. That kind of community helps us grow into maturity as people and as followers of Jesus.
And some people you will pray about… Isn’t it the truth that some folks are just incorrigible! They don’t respond well to correction, even when we’re being our most gentle. They always disagree with us, just for the fun of it. We would never pick them first to play on our team. But we aren’t served by hating them or getting worked up over them. So we pray about them. We turn them over to God, who’s better in the love department than we are, and let it go. Don’t pray and hang on! Pray and let go and move on. It’s been that way in human relationships since the beginning of time.
And some folks will be our best soulmates. Jesus had one disciple who was “beloved.” Tradition says that’s John, although the scripture isn’t clear about that. Of course when he’d gathered a bunch of men and women to travel with him and learn his ways, he had some he liked better than others. We all have close friends. That doesn’t keep us from treating others with respect. But what a good gift of God to give us folks who get us. The ones who laugh with us when no one else understands the joke. The ones who cry with us. The ones who make our days joyful. We say we’re lucky to have friends like that. But it’s not luck – it’s God’s plan for making human life wonderful, and for helping us be the great humans we’re meant to be.
Every community has this rich mix of people. Isn’t it great that when I’m the one that person is praying to tolerate, there’s also someone who thinks I’m the best. That’s why we gather together, so in the mix, we can each find the support and encouragement we need. And enough folks to keep us honest and humble, too. From the very beginning the followers of Jesus have gathered in community, and the guidelines help those communities to be healthy. No hate. Plenty of differences so that we have all we need – all the skills and viewpoints and personalities that make us complete. And a big dose of honesty and respect that helps us get along.
Friday, March 4, 2011
A New Earth
I'm re-reading Eckart Tolle's A New Earth for a class that begins March 15 and remembering how deeply nourishing that text is. It holds a vision that we can become aware of our deep soul nature and live from the peace of that being. In spite of all the things that demand our attention each day, we can still be connected with the wholeness that is the Source of life. No matter how we choose to place our attention as we move from task to task, there is still the hope that we'll remember that at our core we are one with all beings and one with God.
I'm heading out for a few days of R & R in warmer climes. I hope you've each had a chance to find rest this winter, too. In that rest is the hope that we'll re-member who we are and re-connect with the Source that gives us life.
I'm heading out for a few days of R & R in warmer climes. I hope you've each had a chance to find rest this winter, too. In that rest is the hope that we'll re-member who we are and re-connect with the Source that gives us life.
Friday, February 25, 2011
During February a wonderful group of folks has gathered to talk about the book The Four Agreements. This book invites us to look at our beliefs about life to see how they either support our happiness or undermine it. Our basic beliefs are "agreements" we've made based on the way our families, schools, friends, and society have told us life is.
My agreements include "I am not an athlete" and "one can't own too many books." Each of us has thousands of these agreements which govern our automatic responses to life situations. If we have a fender bender we might respond from our "I have rotten luck" agreement, or from one which says, "accidents happen and they are no big deal." Clearly, the way we handle this situation will differ depending on the agreements which are operating.
The more aware we are of the agreements influencing us, the more control we have over our life choices. We can always choose to be happy, no matter what the situation. That choice becomes easier when we make new agreements that support happiness.
One of my new agreements is to blog more regularly, so watch for blog posts soon about the "four" agreements author Don Miguel Ruiz suggests will promote happiness for us all.
My agreements include "I am not an athlete" and "one can't own too many books." Each of us has thousands of these agreements which govern our automatic responses to life situations. If we have a fender bender we might respond from our "I have rotten luck" agreement, or from one which says, "accidents happen and they are no big deal." Clearly, the way we handle this situation will differ depending on the agreements which are operating.
The more aware we are of the agreements influencing us, the more control we have over our life choices. We can always choose to be happy, no matter what the situation. That choice becomes easier when we make new agreements that support happiness.
One of my new agreements is to blog more regularly, so watch for blog posts soon about the "four" agreements author Don Miguel Ruiz suggests will promote happiness for us all.
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Almost Ready!
One scripture I love says the world is "standing on tiptoe" waiting for God to make life new. This is a tiptoe kind of time.
I keep checking the to-do list to be sure I haven't forgotten anything for Christmas preparations at home and at church. It's a tip-toe feeling that our celebration times are almost here!
Right after we celebrate God coming among us, then we celebrate a new year. Standing on tip-toe we can almost see the year coming. A new calendar is like a new box of crayons or a clean, blank piece of paper. So much possibility! I always have high hopes for how I'm going to be a better person in the new year. Then I try to remind myself that I'm the same person, just hoping for some more productive habits.
I'm looking forward to a New Year - New Life class I'm offering in January (Tuesdays, beginning the 4th, 10 am or 7 pm). We're going to bless the year that's closing, for better or for worse. Even the struggles of the year give us opportunities for growth. Then we're going to bless this present moment and remember that offering gratitude for the present grounds us. Finally, we'll look ahead at our goals for 2011. Sometimes that feels like wishful thinking, but I'm hoping we can gain some clues about how to insure that our dreams come true.
May this holiday season hold many blessings for you and yours, and may 2011 be an amazing year for us all!
Gretchen
I keep checking the to-do list to be sure I haven't forgotten anything for Christmas preparations at home and at church. It's a tip-toe feeling that our celebration times are almost here!
Right after we celebrate God coming among us, then we celebrate a new year. Standing on tip-toe we can almost see the year coming. A new calendar is like a new box of crayons or a clean, blank piece of paper. So much possibility! I always have high hopes for how I'm going to be a better person in the new year. Then I try to remind myself that I'm the same person, just hoping for some more productive habits.
I'm looking forward to a New Year - New Life class I'm offering in January (Tuesdays, beginning the 4th, 10 am or 7 pm). We're going to bless the year that's closing, for better or for worse. Even the struggles of the year give us opportunities for growth. Then we're going to bless this present moment and remember that offering gratitude for the present grounds us. Finally, we'll look ahead at our goals for 2011. Sometimes that feels like wishful thinking, but I'm hoping we can gain some clues about how to insure that our dreams come true.
May this holiday season hold many blessings for you and yours, and may 2011 be an amazing year for us all!
Gretchen
Thursday, October 28, 2010
It's been cold and windy in North Dakota for three days. All that time it's been cold in our office, and we've been shivering while we worked. I've been muttering and blaming the weather for our discomfort.
Now the wind has stopped and it's still cold in our office! Clearly, we have an equipment malfunction, and I just now called to have a repair person check it out. If I had called on Monday, we'd be warm by now.
In our lives, it's easy to blame people or circumstances for our problems. A family member, the weather, or God take the brunt of our discontent. Then we discover that no one is to blame, there's just some adjustment that needs to be made. As long as we're in blame mode, we ignore or avoid actions which would actually make our lives better. When we set aside blame (and the muttering that accompanies it!) we can take action and see improvement.
It's good to ask ourselves from time to time what situations are being held back by blame. Then we can turn blame off and start addressing the real causes of our discomfort. Then things can get better!
Now the wind has stopped and it's still cold in our office! Clearly, we have an equipment malfunction, and I just now called to have a repair person check it out. If I had called on Monday, we'd be warm by now.
In our lives, it's easy to blame people or circumstances for our problems. A family member, the weather, or God take the brunt of our discontent. Then we discover that no one is to blame, there's just some adjustment that needs to be made. As long as we're in blame mode, we ignore or avoid actions which would actually make our lives better. When we set aside blame (and the muttering that accompanies it!) we can take action and see improvement.
It's good to ask ourselves from time to time what situations are being held back by blame. Then we can turn blame off and start addressing the real causes of our discomfort. Then things can get better!
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
New Beginnings
Every January I find myself writing about new beginnings. The turning of a year helps us all think about fresh starts and resolutions for improvements in our lives.
Here it is October and the middle of fall - not really the beginning of much of anything and close to the end of a year. But today is still a day for new beginnings. Today I can do what I've put off for weeks. Today I can focus on that decision I've been postponing. Today I can choose to see life with new eyes and new energy.
All it takes to make a new beginning is one deep breath and a resolve to make a fresh start. Think a positive thought. Look on the bright side. Find one thing to be grateful about, even if it's a small thing. Smile and your world shifts in that simple action.
Then get busy and do what you've been putting off. Not the whole list, but just one part. Take a walk around the block. Write an email to a friend. Clean out a drawer.
Small shifts in attitude and simple actions are the beginning of a new way of living, and they are always possible for you today.
Here it is October and the middle of fall - not really the beginning of much of anything and close to the end of a year. But today is still a day for new beginnings. Today I can do what I've put off for weeks. Today I can focus on that decision I've been postponing. Today I can choose to see life with new eyes and new energy.
All it takes to make a new beginning is one deep breath and a resolve to make a fresh start. Think a positive thought. Look on the bright side. Find one thing to be grateful about, even if it's a small thing. Smile and your world shifts in that simple action.
Then get busy and do what you've been putting off. Not the whole list, but just one part. Take a walk around the block. Write an email to a friend. Clean out a drawer.
Small shifts in attitude and simple actions are the beginning of a new way of living, and they are always possible for you today.
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